Initially published August, 2012

We’re nearing the end of the Hebrew month of Av, a time characterized by great challenges, past and present, on national and individual levels.

I’ve always believed that every challenge also holds a gift. It might not be easy, or even possible at times to view them as such. Yet, when we’re able to step back, and allow ourselves to experience our lives from differing perspectives, we can be pleasantly surprised and even grateful for what these challenges might have brought us.

What tests and opportunities for growth has life brought you in the past several weeks? I’d love to hear, so please feel free to share.

In my last newsletter,  I mentioned being in transition, preparing to move out of the home/office I’d enjoyed since moving to Jerusalem nearly 10 years ago. Despite a nearly all-consuming search for a new place, I hadn’t found what felt like the right place before it was time to move.

This situation presented an interesting challenge– where to stay, see clients, teach, live, while continuing to seek my new home/office.

Something in me was apprehensive about the possibility of not having a home and office for an unknown period of time. At the same time, another part felt enlivened by the idea of sharing the homes of friends, sometimes with them, but more often while they were away. The opportunity to experience living in different neighborhoods was also intriguing.

At this point, a little over 6 weeks since my move, I can’t begin to convey how rich this time has been for me. Not easy, for sure, but an incredibly fertile source of growth.

Having now found my new home, I’m still integrating the many gifts that the process of navigating this challenge has brought. Already, I’m grateful for what certainly didn’t feel like a gift many months ago when I learned that my home was about to be sold.

Focusing was a tremendous support to me in these past months. To better describe how this worked, let’s turn again to the month of Av.

The sense associated with this month is hearing. What do you do when you really want to hear someone, or to better understand yourself? Most likely, you pay close attention; you listen with care.

Applying such careful listening to our experience is what we do in Focusing. We treat our feelings, our thoughts, our lives as precious. As deserving of our attention. 

When we listen closely within, what might have felt troublesome, immutable, or simply uncomfortable opens up to show us an inner beauty we’d not have guessed existed there. 

Herbs growing outside a wall in Ein Kerem, Jerusalem

A Taste of Focusing

Here is a taste of Focusing for you to begin to experience the power of this process for yourself.

Sit or lie down, in a place where you won’t be interrupted for at least 5 – 10 minutes.

Notice if you’re comfortable the way you’re sitting/lying. If not, take the time to adjust yourself so that you can be as comfortable as possible.

Take a few nice, deep breaths, allowing the inhalation to fill your belly with air, then also exhale fully, perhaps noticing how it feels just to breathe.

When ready, allow your awareness to shift inside– to the part of your body that includes your throat, your chest or heart center, your stomach and abdomen.

One inside, ask “how am I in here, right now, in this moment?” Or, “how am I holding this particular challenge right now, inside of me?”
 
Ask as though you really care, you really want to know what’s true for you, from the inside. Then just wait, and notice what comes, whatever it might be.

Next, simply acknowledge whatever has come.

Finally, notice how it is to acknowledge yourself in a friendly, compassionate way.

Want to learn more? Have a look at my website, or email me  for more information about learning Focusing, or one-to-one sessions.

Some Quotes on Living, Growing, & Thriving with Life’s Challenges

I’ve found these quotes to be illuminating and comforting when facing challenges. Perhaps you will, too.

“Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature…. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.”  Helen Keller

“If you’re not in over your head, how do you know how tall you are?”   T. S. Elliot

“Help us to be the always hopeful gardeners of the spirit, who know that without darkness nothing comes to birth as without light, nothing flowers.”
May Sarton

“My barn having burned down, I can now see the moon.”  Masahide (Japanese poet)

“Be patient to all that is unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves.”   Rainer Maria Rilke

“There are no negatives in life. Only challenges to overcome that will make you stronger.”